This month has been a true test of fortitude. First off, as mentioned earlier, I’m still trying to find a new job. While I was fortunate to get a temporary project to work on for Nokia (a company I used to work with), it’s not permanent and I’m anxiously awaiting to hear back from one of the many companies I’ve applied to, and those I continue to apply to, with the hopes that I’ll soon land something more long-standing. It’s difficult to plan when you don’t have a date yet for the big surgery. Do I have a month? A few months? Is this going to be happening more than a year from now? Do I sign on for a 3-month contract job or jump with both feet into a full-time perm position? Ugh… (Sorry, I know this is a redundant complaint as I already mentioned this in my last blog, but dang it’s frustrating! LOL!)

Secondly, my work project was a tough one! Work-wise, it was the first time I worked an in-person event in 4 years (since the beginning of Covid!) I have to admit, while I’ve loved working from home, it was so refreshing to get on a plane again and work face-to-face with actual people! It reminded me of how much I love my job! The rush, the setup, the details, the tons of people stories, the exhaustion… the final reveal of it all coming together… all that makes working events a totally exciting experience every single time. What was tough was realizing how out of shape physically I was. Not only have I not done as much walking as I used to (good GOD, I forgot how much walking there was!), but with the kidney siutuation as it is, I was pretty weak at times I wasn’t expecting. I am so used to just digging in and getting things done, but this time, I had to pace myself and ask for more help. I hated that. I’m being smart though, and I know my limits. I realize that I’m not my normal “self” right now, and that my situation right now is temporary until I get a new bean, but it’s not easy to see first-hand my weaknesses where I used to excel. This will pass… and I’ve had to take a page from my fave goof-ball fish Dory and just keep swimming, no matter what. Do what I can. I’ll get there. Baby steps. I can do this! If it’s a month, two months, or a year, I’ll do the backstroke if I have to, but I’m going to keep it up just as I did before!

In the meantime, an update: my insurance has finally approved the transplant and the transplant team has called to start my evaluations. I start my orientation July 17th followed by a string of appts (X-Rays, echocardiograms, etc.) I’m hoping that means things will happen sooner rather than later! I have a feeling my doctor was wanting me to start dialysis soon, but he’s trying to expedite everything so I don’t have to. Crossing my fingers things start moving at a faster pace!

To all of you who have already applied to donate, thank you from the bottom of my heart! I was told that the approval of insurance should also start moving your process forward as well. Not sure what all that entails and they keep it all anonymous, so I can’t give you any details, but they should have provided you with a number to call with any and all questions you might have!

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Things I’m thankful for today:

1.  I made it back to in-person events after 4 years! I was wondering when it would happen again! 😉 I’m thankful that I had no serious issues happen while away and that it was as fun as I remembered.

2.  Stretchy jeans. Since I’m not on dialysis, the fluid build up comes and goes. I have gained 10 pounds of fluid in one week only to lose it the next. So glad I have stretchy jeans that can mold with me during these times!

3.  Trader Joe’s Gluten Free Strawberry Muffins. What? These things are soooo good! I am having to force myself NOT to go get more as they are dangerously good!

4.  Friends/family. Whether I’m working with you or just having a drink and hanging out, I’m so thankful that I have such an amazing support group to keep me going! When I’m not in my “safe place” at home with all comforts, you guys have shown time and again that you are my “blanket” that makes me feel safe. Those of you who have to travel with health issues all know how this feels!